Less Hustle, More Flow: Career Advice for PSOs & Everyone Else.

First of all: HAPPY NEW YEAR!

This blog post is a little bit different than what I usually post. It’s written for other flirts, as well as clients. And it’s less about sex and more about magic, and how to apply magic to working smarter!

There are a lot of self proclaimed experts in the field of sex work marketing their services right now. While I have provided consulting to new flirts upon request, I do not personally believe that career advice is a one size fits all matter. I’ve become very successful breaking a lot of the so-called “rules” for phone sex success. For example: I’ve never kept a schedule, because time is a socially constructed illusion (just kidding…sorta). The truth is, I’m a free spirit and I quit a successful 9-5 career because I hated keeping a schedule, so why would I force myself to have one now that I run my own business?

I’ve actually deliberate steered clear of other people’s “advice,” because I’ve always found, in all the jobs I’ve had, that I am most successful if I ignore the rules and follow my gut. A lot of so-called advice is actually opinions or personal anecdotes. As they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions. The one exception is when clients give me feedback. I used to not send out mass mailings because I thought they might be a turn-off for clients, until a client told me he WANTED to be notified of when I released new MP3s. The fact is that many client do ignore mass mails, but at the end of the daily, I decided that sending out occasional, well-constructed mails was actually integral to my success, even if it turned off a few people here and there. In this industry it’s expected that you send out marketing mails as a successful provider.

For this reason, the advice I give others is generally to trust your instincts and figure out a path that works for YOU rather than trying to follow someone else’s recipe for success. But there is one bit of advice I hear floating around quite a bit that I actually think has the potential to harm your career by causing rapid burnout. That advice is “hustle harder.”

Recently a meme popped up on my Twitter timeline that said “HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO GET RICH IF YOU SLEEP NINE HOURS EVERY NIGHT” and I laughed out loud, because I generally sleep 9 hours nightly, plus a nap if I need it. The idea that I should sleep less or not take time for myself is completely counter-intuitive, as far as I am concerned. Well rested Goddess= happy, productive Goddess. I need plenty of rest in order to have the focus to offer intense calls that often involve a lot of mental gymastics or deep hypnotic programming. I need time to rest and dream in order to access my creative flow, do my spiritual work, and realize my personal vision.

If I followed other people’s advice I could try to predict “what clients want” based on a spreadsheet. Or I can channel insight from the Red Goddess herself. Guess what content actually sells best? The MP3s that I was EXCITED and INSPIRED to make. Clients notice when the passion is present. I am more successful putting more time and love into a smaller amount of high quality content than constantly cranking out more, more, more when I don’t feel excited about what I am creating. Pushing too hard leads to burnout and boredom, which is not sexy, and not conducive to career success.

Capitalism is a helluva drug, y’all. But there is more to life than spending every waking minute chasing dollars. You can’t take money to the grave, and phone sex is about sensuality, pleasure, playfulness, fun, and in my case- spiritual transformation for both me and my slaves. The money just happens to be an enjoyable result of doing what I am passionate about for a living. I do this work because I am a creative person who lives within the moment, not a slave to schedules and spreadsheets!

All this said, what works for me won’t work for everyone. Nevertheless, I do think that it’s important to think about working smarter, not harder. I realize this flies in the face of everything we’ve been taught under capitalism. I remember the first time my person trainer explained the concept of HIIT to me- High Intensity Interval Training. With HIIT, you alternate spurts of maximum effort exertion with longer periods of lower intensity recovery. Your workout is over in 20 minutes. And you get more benefit from working out this way than slogging away for an hour straight. I didn’t want to believe it was possible. It seemed too easy to be effective — even though there was science to back it up. I resisted HIIT initially, almost as if I believed that exercise SHOULD be tedious in order to be effective (and I don’t!) The same principle applies to work. Of course it is necessary to exert a sincere effort to get results, but the truth is, if you are in alignment with your personal flow, it won’t feel tedious. It will feel exhilarating. And a small amount of really focused, intentional high quality effort will have a much better payoff than hours of drudgery. You should never be working harder than you need to be, unless you really get off on being bored and miserable, in which case I recommend re-assessing your outlook on life.

Continuing the exercise analogy- if I never get off the couch, I won’t get fitness gains. But I’ll get more gains for 20 minutes of HIIT four times a week than an hour of repetitive cardio daily. And I’ll also be more excited to work out if I know I can knock it off my to-do list in twenty minutes, and if I see more tangible results more quickly. And then I can spend that extra 40 minutes having sex, meditating, or taking a nap! AAAAAND- here’s the real kicker- I’ll actually get better results if I don’t do HIIT every day, because my body can’t build muscle without rest and gentler recovery days.

I’ve noticed an interesting pattern- if I try to force myself to work when I’m exhausted, I don’t get calls. There’s no rhyme or reason to it, but it’s true. I end up going to bed tired AND frustrated, when I could have just gone to bed! But if I’m in a good mood and energized, the phone rings off the hook. Pushing against the tide is being out of alignment. If you follow the natural flow of energy, do what you enjoy instead of what you think others want from you, and allow yourself to rest when you feel tired, amazing things will happen. Believe it.

Dark Blessings,

Goddess Eriko

Witchcraft Wednesday: Sigil Magick

Welcome to Witchcraft Wednesday! This is a new series of blog posts I will be making to give you deeper insight to the Magick that I practice as the High Priestess of the Cult of the Red Goddess.  

Today I want to give an introduction to the concept of Sigil Magick, as well as giving you my personal Sigil which you can use to feel more deeply bound to me. Here is an excellent article on Sigil Magick if you'd like to explore this on a deeper level. 

If you don't feel like reading that article, here's the important part: "Sigil magic is the art of using symbols and imagery to manifest a specific intent or outcome. A meaningless shape or figure that is given meaning by the magician and then deployed, released among the target population to spread like a virus." 

The author tend goes on to describe how a corporate logo can function in this way as a very powerful mind-control device. In the third lesson of my advanced Initiation to the Cult of the Red Goddess Course,  I introduced my personal sigil: 

I am offering this sigil free of charge to my acolytes as a gift (but you are welcome to offer a tribute as thanks). It is a very powerful tool you can use to bind yourself more deeply to me in servitude and worship. 

You may activate this sigil to work it's magick on you by looking at it as you masturbate. Stare it as you reach your climax, imagine dedicating your orgasmic energy to me. 

You also may draw it or print it out and carry it with you (in your wallet, if you'd like to send some prosperity magic my way!) or close to your body in a pants or shirt pocket, inside your pillow, etc.

You can also look at the sigil while praying to me, edging, or listening to one of my recordings to form an intense energetic link to me. 

You can also commission a custom sigil spell from me, request a tarot card reading, or submit a petition if you wish to be included in my next New Moon or Full Moon binding spell. Next one will be cast on 7/13/18. 

Until next time.....

XOXO

Goddess Eriko

My PSO Story

I get asked a lot about how I got into working as a PSO, both by clients and friends. (I also have a lot of people ask me to help them get into the biz, but that’s another story for another time). In case you are wondering, yes, Niteflirt is how I make a living. I also make and sell artwork under a different name, but phone sex is where the majority of my income comes from. It’s a wonderful job that allows me to meet many different kinds of people, offers me flexible hours, and allows me to work from anywhere (which is amazing because travel is my favorite hobby!) The best part is I get paid to talk about sex, which is something I love to do anyway!

I started out by working for an agency when I was eighteen years old. It was a good way to make money as a college student, but to be honest, I hated working for this particular agency (who will remain anonymous). They charged my clients as much as $5 a minute, while paying me less than minimum wage. They made me lie to the clients and say that I was calling a party line for free, and I was never allowed to admit that I was a PSO. My phone was connected to hundreds of lines, and I rarely spoke the the same person twice, let alone had any opportunities to build relationships with regulars. Every time the phone rang, a voice would tell me what type of call it was (Latina, Asian, Ebony, BD/SM, Smoking, Hairy Woman, etc. etc. etc.), so I was pretending to be dozens of different girls everyday! It was sort of stressful having to make up a new character every single time instead of getting to be myself (which I do now). 

I quit the agency after a year, after becoming fed up with the exploitative ways they treated their employees. I took a break from phone sex for a while, but found myself missing it. I loved talking to clients about their fantasies. A friend told me about Niteflirt. I wasn’t sure at first if I would make enough money as an independent PSO, since it was up to me to create my own profiles and so forth rather than simply having calls routed to me. I was surprised when I realized I could make more money in one day on Niteflirt than I’d make in a month at the agency. (Wish I was joking- the agency was really that bad.) The Niteflirt platform is a great fit for me, and six years later, I haven’t looked back since. 

It's wonderful having the power to control my image, rates, and marketing, as well as the opportunity to develop deeply satisfying relationships with my clients. I’ve continued to grow my business over the years by offering custom recordings, photo sets, and other content, as well as gaining a social media presence through my Twitter & this blog. It’s been great getting to share more about me and my life with clients, as well as getting to know them better as well! 

Another fun fact about my career as a PSO: I have a Master’s degree and have held down some prestigious jobs while doing this work. At some point I just realized that it paid better and I liked it more than anything else I could be doing. I think at the end of the day I'm a creative person and social butterfly and this is the best fit for my personality on so many levels. 

So that’s pretty much my PSO story. Would love to hear about what first brought you to Niteflirt the next time we chat! 

My Favorite Fantasies: Hypnosis

I was on Niteflirt for several years before I began exploring hypnosis. Clients frequently requested it, but I had never studied any methods, so I didn't feel confident to try it.

At this point, hypnosis may be one of my favorite activities to explore with clients, and I have received a great deal of positive feedback regarding my technique.

I learned hypnosis by developing my own technique, one that I believe is more effective than traditional methods that are often outdated and so cliched that they often make it harder to make the subject into trance. I developed my style based on my experience as a meditator and practicioner of Tantra and Yoga. I know how to induce a trance state in myself very well, and I applied this same method to my subjects, and it works wonderfully. I also enter a trance state of my own while giving hypnosis, and find it to be very relaxing.

Since I have begun, I have read some books on the subject as well as consulting with experts. However I am glad I begun with my own instincts rather than using another person's method. More than anything, interpersonal chemistry and genuine connection is what matters the most.

I believe hypnosis is one of the most effective ways to deepen a sense of surrender in my submissive clients, as well as a wonderful tool for entering pure intimate, erotic bliss. 

Want a taste of my silky, hypnotic voice? Give me a call.